Nothing to do with WW1 but very 'de jour'

[Darryl]

Given the current Y2K sillyness, thought you'd like this...

If Airlines Were Run by Computer Operating Systems.

DOS Airlines
Everybody pushes the aeroplane until it glides then they jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground then push again and so on.

DOS with QEMM Airlines
Same thing with more leg room to push.

MAC Airlines
All the stewardesses, Captains, baggage handlers and ticket officers look the same, act the same and talk the same. Every time you ask a question you are told you don't need to know, don't want to know and that everything will be done for you without you having to know ..so shut up.

OS/2 Airlines
To board the plane you have to have stand in ten different lines to get your ticket stamped in ten different places. Then you fill out a form showing where you want to sit and whether the plane should look and feel like an ocean liner, a passenger train or a bus. If you succeed in getting aboard and the plane succeeds in taking off you have a wonderful trip...except for the times when the rudder and flaps get frozen in position in which case you have the time to say your prayers and get into crash positions.

Windows 3.1 Airlines.
The airport terminal is nice and colourful with pretty hostesses and easy access to the plane. The seats are comfortable and you have a completely uneventful takeoff.
Once in the air the plane explodes without warning. Crash investigators find no apparent reason.

Windows 95 Airlines.
As for Windows 3.1 but the plane explodes less often and you sometimes get some warning. Crash investigators find some small, insignificant part which has caused the failure.

Windows 98 Airlines
As for Windows 95 but you explode even less often, you usually get some warning, a flamable nylon parachute is provided and crash investigators find that an important part has caused the failure.

Windows NT Airlines.
Once the plane gets off the ground it flys very well. The flight crew boards the aircraft with no training, no manual and no charts, they just figure it out as they go.

UNIX Airlines
Everybody brings a piece of the plane to the airport. They all go out on the runway and assemble the plane piece by piece, arguing constantly about what kind of plane they are building.


appealed to me anyway...

Darryl

Darryl,
HILARIOUS! Good on you mate.
VBR,
Jim

[Vic_Mouton]

What scares me most is that this is so close to the truth! (At least they are more reliable than the real world air lines)

VBR
Vic

[mike_baram]

LINUX airlines: It takes off with one engine and returns with two. Takes off again and returns with another wing. Takes off again and comes back twice the size. Et cetera.