Update:
As I previously mentioned, the install itself was cruel and unusual punishment, requiring me to uninstall and re-install 3 times before all the game components and third-party software was loaded. Funny how uninstall takes just seconds but a full install took hours. I have well over a TB of memory so space wasn't a problem.
Then I noticed that my video card was having troubles. It turns out that it isn't quite up to the game requirements, and my machine is so ancient that it cannot accept an upgrade sufficient to handle the game graphics. Nor can it handle the power supply upgrade needed to handle a new video card.
If you, too, are using a 4-5 year-old computer, don't bother trying to play this game. It's time to upgrade to a new machine.
So I've uninstalled the game, set it on the shelf, and when I have the $1400-$2000 needed for a new computer that will actually run the game, I'll give it another try.
Now, the video card problem aside, (which is clearly my fault for just assuming that my card would handle the game graphics), the install itself still sucked eggs, and the hottest video card on the planet wouldn't have made that any smoother. It took quite literally DAYS to get it loaded, not 5 minutes as a previous poster mentioned.
You guys have fun with the game, I'll hopefully join you sometime in the next year or so. I can't justify a new machine just for the sake of a game at this time.