Modeling Health 401

NeilE · 13 February 2003, 09:20 PM

Arthur "Bluey" Green (AKA "Aqua" Green) from Uptagumbumbta, a small cattle station just back of Bourke (about three miles as the crow flies from the Black Stump) was a close personal friend of the Good Herr Doktor Von Humbrol during his days in Old Sydney Town in the early 1930's*. Bluey was reputed to be one of the crack select pilots chosen to fly the Se5adb fortuitously mentioned on another thread about Se5a's recently here on The Aerodrome.

Anyway, during the Good Herr Doktor's sojourn in Sydney in his bedsit at 239 Darlinghurst Rd, Kings Cross, he and Bluey spent many happy hours modeling together. However, Bluey was an impatient type and was always disatisfied with glue drying times. Unbeknownst to the Good Herr Doktor, Bluey began experiementing with various substances to make his glue dry faster. Other this time he saw less and less of Von Humbrol.

One day the Good Herr Doktor ran into Bluey down the Cross near one of Sydney Vice Queen, Tilly Devine's evil establishments. Bluey looked terrible. All he could tell the Good Herr Doktor was that he had found the perfect accellerant - he kept muttering about "Snow, Luverly Snow" doing the job for him like nothing else.

Afterwards The Good Herr Doktor did some investigating and found that Bluey had been using cocaine as an accellerant all that time and had got himself a nasty addiction. Worse still, he found that Bluey owed Tilly a lot of cash, andhad Guido "The Razor" Huma after him too.

The Good Herr Doktor thought fast...he had Bluey shipped off to Uncle Gunze Sankyo's establishment for a cure. Then he confronted Tilly and got the debt wiped by building her a 1/32 model of the new Sydney Harbour Bridge made entirely out of used shotgun shells in the back yard of one of her bawdy houses in Darlinghurst. he found out from Tilly that the lady of ill repute who sold the snow to Bluey was a mysterious recent English immigrant known as "Busty Dymphna". The Good Herr Doktor confronted her and recognising her immediately as his old nemesis, had her run out of town by Big George Smith, a shady modeler known mainly for his deadly extra sharp No 11 Exactos.

Shortly after this The Good Herr Doktor took a tramp steamer to Venice and never saw Bluey again. It is rumoured that after his cure, Bluey became a well known IPMS judge for many years. "Busty" Dymphna's name became legion.

The moral of this story is keep away from accelllerants - they harm your health, hurt your nose and give you a weak joint anyway.

All the Best

Neil 8)
Director M.O.D.E.L

*See "The Doktor Downunder" Vol 4 "The Collected Diaries of Doktor Kurt Von Humbrol" PP 34-110: M.O.D.E.L. 2002.

Barker · 14 February 2003, 02:40 AM

Quote:

The moral of this story is keep away from accelllerants - they harm your health, hurt your nose and give you a weak joint anyway.

Bluey stopped by yesterday to leave this:
"And if you must sniff them, wear a mask."

Then he muttered off, something about "feels nice out, think I'll leave it out" and haven't seen him since.

Good thing. I had dropped a big part and was searching high and low for it. In event, as concerns Bluey - There's no accounting for taste.

Ross_Moorhouse · 14 February 2003, 02:45 AM

A very dear old friend of mine, Mary Klaus, was telling me tales of her youth the other day. She is a dear old lady and is in fact married to Santa Klaus. Mary is also a really good model maker. Her work in 1/144th is outstanding. I asked her once why she builds in this scale. With a cheeky smile and a twinkle in her eye she told me that up at the North Pole everything shrinks so she is used to seeing small bits.

Anyway this is not related to what I wanted to share with you. It is about Mary and her relationship with Busty Dymphna. It's a real small world when you see Dr. Neil posting this ladies name. If Mary saw this name mentioned here she would turn bright red and hide her head in shame. You see Busty Dymphna is Mary's mother. Mary is a love child. I do hope Mary forgives me for telling you this and a little bit about her and her mother.

During WWII a strapping young man from Queensland was demobbed from the RAAF’s secret model building unit. They used to build models in 1/8 scale of WWI planes trying to fool the Japs into thinking they were fighting their Allies. Many a model of a Camel was seen stationed around the Pacific. I think a young Jap soldier, Lt. Tamyia may even of lead a Banzi charge against one of these models when they came saw it sitting there all by itself on an abandoned airfield. Recon photos show that the 1/8 Camel was removed by the Japs. Intelligence seems to suggest that Lt.Tamyia’s commandeering Office Capt.Hasegawa took the Camel as war booty. Again I am getting off track.

Because of the failed deception by this secret model making unit this young Queenslander was sent home well before the war ended. His ship landed him in Sydney. He wandered the streets looking for model shops. But was at least 10 years too early for the opening of Hobbyco on George street. He, like many other service men in this city found himself up at the Cross. Kings Cross is a magnet for model makers. In dark corners of pubs throughout Sydney *model makers talk of the black market trade at the Cross in model supplies. Of course our young Queenslander overheard these conversations. He had to sample what was reputed to be the best in glues and paints that only the black market could supply.

One night he found himself walking up a set of narrow stairs in a 3 storey building at the Cross. He had been told that he could buy CA in a room at top of the building. This was a secret glue the RAAF had been using to construct their 1/8 scale models. Just the thought of using this glue again brought back memories of a steamy jungle and the smell of CA to our young Queenslander. What the government of the day hadn’t told their troops as that CA changes the way you look. Many young men came back from these secret units and were not at first recognised by their families. The effects of CA was that devastating on a persons features. *Some men came back with fingers stuck to their faces. Others had bits of the models stuck to their heads.

Ross_Moorhouse · 14 February 2003, 02:46 AM

As our young Queenslander came to the top of the landing and stared at the door he was about to enter into he heard the giggling of a female. He had forgotten what it was like to be in the company of such delightful creatures. His mind raced and his vision blurred for a moment as he fought down his emotions. Could it be true? To sample the delights of a lady of models and CA at the same time. No! he thought, its too good to be true. Thrusting back his shoulders he marched up to the door and flung it open. There at a modelling desk was Busty Dymphna. Her beauty was enhanced by the naked light bulb that was suspended just over the desk. In her hands were parts of a 1/8th Camel. Stacked on shelves behind her were row upon row of CA bottles. Over come with raw model making lust our young Queenslander flung himself down next to Busty. Their heads turned to each other. Their eyes met. Busty handed him a bottle of CA, she flung her head back, her dark locks of hair revealed the shine of dried CA and many model bits glued into her hair. She laughed long and hard. The laugh that could only come from one who used CA. They knew that this night would be a night of unbridled model making passion. Together they became one at the desk. CA had done its evil work again to our young Queenslander. The demon glue had him in it's claws once more.

The next morning he awoke to find himself in a damp alleyway. The cold of the cobble stones reaching into his bones. But this was the least of his troubles. He could not remember a thing from the previous night. His mind had that fuzzy feeling that comes from a session of late night model making. He ran his hands through his hair and found that small bits of a model were glued to his scalp. As the morning sun crept down the alleyway he saw his refection in a broken piece of glass. What he saw and had felt in his hair brought back a dim memory of the night before. He could remember a big bottle of CA and Busty’s wild laugh. A sly smile spread across his face. He knew he was hooked again.

In this story our young Queenslander bows out at this stage. He travelled from model show to model show following the CA trail and has not been seen for many years. Word has it that when Big George Smith ran Busty out of Sydney he may also have ran our Queenslander out too. But Mary isn’t sure about these details.

Mary was born in the back of a run down model shop near Flinders Street Railway Station in Melbourne nine months after our young Queenslander and Busty spent their night of unbridled model making passion together. Mary is a sworn opponent of the use of CA. As she grew up she saw her mother at her model making desk and saw how CA changed this beautiful woman. Mary swore she would never use CA.

When Mary was in her teens she attended the Humbrol School of Vacforming. But she soon dropped out when she found that there was a small group of students who had introduced CA into the school.

Mary packed her bags and did as most drop outs do travelled north. It was on this trip that she met and fell in love with Santa Klaus. So ends a small chapter in the wide world of model making.

stringbags4ever2 · 14 February 2003, 02:58 AM

To Neil_E and Steve:

And wouldn't you like to know what I wear (or don't wear) under the apron...... (I'm only naughty around my wife).

Actually, I don't wear any aprons when I build. When a part goes flying, I search and search on the floor with my high intensity lamp....

As far as accellerants go, I only use it when I want an instantaneous bond, and then only for real small parts....

Model on!

Pete

Barker · 14 February 2003, 03:43 AM

Rummaging around I found this old thing:

Seeing no similar physiogomy, Bluey wandered the land, forlorn. He was often seen at family gatherings and seasonal celebrations desperately trying to enter the "3-legged man race". Given that criteria, Bluey produced his very own partner whilst the celebrants muttered off, something about all men and equality. Bluey was the last one to know, it seems. The least-obsessed in the midst, Bluey had come to believe that everyone was outfitted by the same good natured gent and so did not fully understand the obsessional references to size until waking up in a men's loo somewhere outside Uptagumbumbpta one late evening (3 a.m. as the crow measures).
Looking up bleary-eyed, startled, Bluey noticed the cause of all the scorn with which he'd been heaped.
Seems what the others had been demonstrating against all along was their own short-comings.
Bluey found this irrelevant and wondered further still in the septums of his higher organ, finally concluding that the more you discussed it the less you had to show for it.

All aspiration ceased to IPMS events, noting that the letters had a strange co-incidence to a "female trait".
Lout that he was, he cared little. The smaller scale was a poor simulation anyway.

NeilE · 14 February 2003, 05:17 AM

Quote:

(The visiting prof. whispers)Pssssssst Neil, your supposed to wear your *prescription lenses with the optivisor. That way your RX is magnified and there's even less chance for your eyes to be strained . * *

Pop Quiz: What makes a substance Toxic?

Re Optivisors: D'oh!

Re: Accellerants: I don't hold with 'em. Apart from the toxicity, I find the convenience of using them is outweighed by the almost complete lack of shearing strength they have. Many is the part I have had to reglue following it coming off or loose due to the brittleness of CA joins treated with Zip Kicker.

Toxicity: Relating as previously posted to the body's inability to efficiently and safely process particular substances.

It is important to note that many chemical compounds we use vary in their toxic potentials (from mild to hideous), and that toxicity is also a product of how healthy we are; in some cases a healthy body will process some compounds more efficiently than an unhealthy one.

My rule of thumb is to not play games with any of them.

All the Best

Neil

(PS Sydney was certainly a wild old place!)

StephenLawson · 14 February 2003, 02:24 PM

You never know what you'll learn or be burdened with when you come to class..... :

Barker · 14 February 2003, 02:34 PM

Most certainly not!
Pity.
You never know who'll be the first to bring it up and beat the hell out of it either.

It's only fun when one is on one's own sunny side, isn't it?

No matter.
None of these creatures are real. :

StephenLawson · 15 February 2003, 02:50 PM

Neil and Barker have said '...Toxicity: Relating as previously posted to the body's inability to efficiently and safely process particular substances.'

In essence what make a substance toxic is its composition and its duration of exposure and the body's resultant inability to deal with its use or passing.

There are at least 29 possible chemicals that most modelers are subjected to regularly. Each one is toxic to one degree or another.

Have you ever noticed a sheen on resin type kit pieces. This is probably a resin that has used formaldehyde in its manufacture. This material can absorb directly into the skin.

Even a cheap cardboard box with a small self contained desk fan and an old vacum cleaner hose can give you a functional and cheap paint booth. Model Railroaders are highly familiar with these concerns and we can take a page from their instruction books on safety in gratitude. Latex gloves and paper sanitary masks sold at any pharmacy will in the long run make modeling a safer endeavour.

Pop Quiz: How much ventilation is adequate?